http://www.laurassoapbox.net/2014/01/we-need-to-stop-calling-it-non.html and else where I heard much, enough already.
Non-compliance is a term that there is much whining about, when it simply means that the subject is not following the plan, and it must be the subjects fault as our plan is good and sound, well perhaps not, but it is our plan. No one may be able to follow it, but if you could, the problem would go away. With diet, the typical plan is three meals per day, possibly snacks, and likely specifying or excluding some foods or food groups.
As I have struggled with weight issues my entire life, I have watched what and how people eat, and I can tell you that most people do not comply with what the health professionals say we should be eating. Many of them also do not comply with there own advise.
I see people not following our recommendations, in my engineering work, we say they are non-compliant, aka not following directions. What can I do? We recommended what was good and right and true, and they are not following it. It is their problem, and may become the owners. Get over it.
Whether they could follow the plan or not is irrelevant. Now perhaps the plan did not address the real problem. Diet is driven by convince, cultural, historic, physiological, psychological, philosophic, spiritual, thinking, feeling, behaviors, habits, emotional, environmental and well as just change issues. Start with philosophical, for that can overcome much shit.
Are you (or the subject) willing to delve into all these areas of your life? Are you willing to change, and to study change, or just whine in the precontemplation and contemplation stages? Are you willing to tear your personal philosophy apart and clean it up? Recovery requires compliance, if you are not willing to comply, you are non-compliant. Get over it or not. Get on with life or not. It is your choice. It is the subjects choice. You may be deeply troubled by the actions of loved ones, but you cannot change them much, they need to change themselves. Kiss them goodby, for they are mortals, and will die. We can only change ourselves.
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
Saturday, January 25, 2014
Change is a choice
http://michaelprager.com/first-requirement-for-change-is-sincerely-wanting
Michael got me thinking about a book I read, Changing for Good. It deals with one cut of the stages and processes we go through in change and has some lovely points that help foster the change process.
Smart manual also says Change is a choice. But the problem I struggle with is what do I need to change? Behavior is driven by desire, feeling and thinking. So what in my thinking do I need to change to make correction of this problem automatic? No sugar, grains, omega 6 oils, and a bunch of other poisons are not foods. That goes along way. But how do we deal with biological cravings that are persistent, that is do not go away. These just grind, cue, desire, craving... It is not low impulse control, it is high frequency of cues... high frequency marketing...
And then there is to much available... all the time.
But what do I know?
Perhaps it must come down to what Socrates said: Reason with passion must govern over desires.
Michael got me thinking about a book I read, Changing for Good. It deals with one cut of the stages and processes we go through in change and has some lovely points that help foster the change process.
Smart manual also says Change is a choice. But the problem I struggle with is what do I need to change? Behavior is driven by desire, feeling and thinking. So what in my thinking do I need to change to make correction of this problem automatic? No sugar, grains, omega 6 oils, and a bunch of other poisons are not foods. That goes along way. But how do we deal with biological cravings that are persistent, that is do not go away. These just grind, cue, desire, craving... It is not low impulse control, it is high frequency of cues... high frequency marketing...
And then there is to much available... all the time.
But what do I know?
Perhaps it must come down to what Socrates said: Reason with passion must govern over desires.
Sunday, January 19, 2014
In a Blinding Flash
Change in thinking, in a blinding flash of clarity. I is You, and you is equal to I, for this post. "I has seen the enemy, and We is him." This blog may go on a tangent for a while.
When we find something wrong in our thinking,
is it easier to figure out what is wrong and fix that
or to rebuild our thinking, foundation and upwards,
from first principles? Philosophically.
This may or may not be a hypothetical question.
Suppose that in the matter of a few weeks you could learn
to rebuild the core of your directing mind
into something that worked without problems? The construction of the inner citidel.
Suppose that in a few hard weeks you could
discover the answers to questions that haunted you for years?
Suppose that in a few more weeks you could learn
to change your life in radical ways,
would you be interested in having a look? I need to explore this for sure.
What is the foundation of thought? The discipline of judgement, the discipline of desire, the discipline of impulse, knowing what we have control of and what we do not, and knowing what things are.
What is the directing mind, or soul? It is the work product of the mind, separate from the sense gathering facility and the memory facility.
What is the discipline of judgement? it is the primary way of assent.
What is the discipline of desire?
What is the discipline of impulse?
What is good and evil, and indifference?.
What do we have control of in life, and what do we not?
What is god? God may be just a concept, or the sum of all forces including biological forces; it is also logic, reason and perhaps life, but life is a biological force.
What is the purpose of human life, how do you fit into the whole? Human purpose is to produce, to create, to learn, to explore, to understand, and to use that information for the propagation of the race and to support propagation.
What does security mean? Security is a concept, an idea, a feeling, it has no real component. It grows from infant attachment. It is a feeling that all is well, that we have enough resources, enough of whatever. The ease of security come from needing little.
When is it time to turn and charge the proverbial lion? When there is no longer any value in striving, when the end is inevitable, it may be better to make the end quick.
What is a adequate image of an real object, situation, action?
It is the mental object that our directing mind or soul sees, and passes judgement on. It is only a image that enters us, nothing physical. It can do nothing. It is us that does everything.
Will Rodgers said something like
"we are all ignorant of much, and know a little bit well."
Be happy, smile easily, eat real food and enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish.
When we find something wrong in our thinking,
is it easier to figure out what is wrong and fix that
or to rebuild our thinking, foundation and upwards,
from first principles? Philosophically.
This may or may not be a hypothetical question.
Suppose that in the matter of a few weeks you could learn
to rebuild the core of your directing mind
into something that worked without problems? The construction of the inner citidel.
Suppose that in a few hard weeks you could
discover the answers to questions that haunted you for years?
Suppose that in a few more weeks you could learn
to change your life in radical ways,
would you be interested in having a look? I need to explore this for sure.
What is the foundation of thought? The discipline of judgement, the discipline of desire, the discipline of impulse, knowing what we have control of and what we do not, and knowing what things are.
What is the directing mind, or soul? It is the work product of the mind, separate from the sense gathering facility and the memory facility.
What is the discipline of judgement? it is the primary way of assent.
What is the discipline of desire?
What is the discipline of impulse?
What is good and evil, and indifference?.
What do we have control of in life, and what do we not?
What is god? God may be just a concept, or the sum of all forces including biological forces; it is also logic, reason and perhaps life, but life is a biological force.
What is the purpose of human life, how do you fit into the whole? Human purpose is to produce, to create, to learn, to explore, to understand, and to use that information for the propagation of the race and to support propagation.
What does security mean? Security is a concept, an idea, a feeling, it has no real component. It grows from infant attachment. It is a feeling that all is well, that we have enough resources, enough of whatever. The ease of security come from needing little.
When is it time to turn and charge the proverbial lion? When there is no longer any value in striving, when the end is inevitable, it may be better to make the end quick.
What is a adequate image of an real object, situation, action?
It is the mental object that our directing mind or soul sees, and passes judgement on. It is only a image that enters us, nothing physical. It can do nothing. It is us that does everything.
Will Rodgers said something like
"we are all ignorant of much, and know a little bit well."
Be happy, smile easily, eat real food and enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish.
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Cost Benefit Analysis
Draft post, may change over time
Have you done a Cost Benefit Analysis on Overeating? (after SMART)
List everything under four categorizes, The Cost of Overeating, The Benefit of Overeating, The Cost of Not Overeating, The Benefit of Not Overeating, then consider short term and long term. Also note that everything that is a current benefit of overeating, which is not under not overeating must be somehow replaced. If Food is something your family socializes around, how are you going to replace that? Not socializing? Sitting in front of food, being tempted, and not eating... self torture?
Not everybody has all these effects. Those of us that do... oh well... and we wonder why failure is so common.
The Cost of Overeating
Weight up, health down
early death, perhaps... a benefit...
The Benefit of Overeating
Increased feeling of personal security, and actually security
Sedation effect of food, we feel less
We are sedated ... less anxiety, less agitation, less emotion....
Overeating is a maladaptive coping skill for an unmanageable life
An activity to socialize around
A social subject of interest to many people, cooking, food talk... etc.
Life as it is, going with the flow to early death.....
early death, unless that is wanted, not suicide, self killing, but rather not wanting to live
The Cost of Not Overeating
Special food cost, preparation, portioning
Learning to waste food
Learning to make food uneatable, soap, salt, pepper, Olive oil (I hate olive oil), sugar (poison)
After meal get up and leave activity... until satiation develops...
Learning to reject food place in front of us by food pushers, the food must leave, or I leave.
Learning new adaptive coping skills, coping methods, and other skills
Learning about physiological food requirements
Learning about psychological body needs
Living both with phy and psy need only, without excess
Learning useful non-food methods of passing excess time
Teaching other abusive idiot food pushers the facts or staying away
Meetings, time, service,
Learning new activities to socialize around
Learning to live with cravings that do not go away. (some go, some cravings get worse)
Learning to cope with bating by assholes.
The Benefit of Not Overeating
Weight down, health increases
lower food costs, well maybe not, better food may cost more
Have you done a Cost Benefit Analysis on Overeating? (after SMART)
List everything under four categorizes, The Cost of Overeating, The Benefit of Overeating, The Cost of Not Overeating, The Benefit of Not Overeating, then consider short term and long term. Also note that everything that is a current benefit of overeating, which is not under not overeating must be somehow replaced. If Food is something your family socializes around, how are you going to replace that? Not socializing? Sitting in front of food, being tempted, and not eating... self torture?
Not everybody has all these effects. Those of us that do... oh well... and we wonder why failure is so common.
The Cost of Overeating
Weight up, health down
early death, perhaps... a benefit...
The Benefit of Overeating
Increased feeling of personal security, and actually security
Sedation effect of food, we feel less
We are sedated ... less anxiety, less agitation, less emotion....
Overeating is a maladaptive coping skill for an unmanageable life
An activity to socialize around
A social subject of interest to many people, cooking, food talk... etc.
Life as it is, going with the flow to early death.....
early death, unless that is wanted, not suicide, self killing, but rather not wanting to live
The Cost of Not Overeating
Special food cost, preparation, portioning
Learning to waste food
Learning to make food uneatable, soap, salt, pepper, Olive oil (I hate olive oil), sugar (poison)
After meal get up and leave activity... until satiation develops...
Learning to reject food place in front of us by food pushers, the food must leave, or I leave.
Learning new adaptive coping skills, coping methods, and other skills
Learning about physiological food requirements
Learning about psychological body needs
Living both with phy and psy need only, without excess
Learning useful non-food methods of passing excess time
Teaching other abusive idiot food pushers the facts or staying away
Meetings, time, service,
Learning new activities to socialize around
Learning to live with cravings that do not go away. (some go, some cravings get worse)
Learning to cope with bating by assholes.
The Benefit of Not Overeating
Weight down, health increases
lower food costs, well maybe not, better food may cost more
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Replace Overeating
Overeating is a coping method. We use overeating to compensate for feelings of various kinds, or as sedation to not deal with something, or to fill time. We use overeating as a social distraction, or an activity to socialize around. When we end overeating, we need a replacement methods to replace that "reward" that we were obtaining from overeating. It took me many years for me to see the "reward". I do not like the handle "reward". The coping effect is the desired effect, a unconscious need fulfilment, not a "reward". It is the unconscious driver of the disorder, and we need to find a replacement, if we are going to be successful in overcoming overeating.
OA can provide a replacement for a period of time, as it does take time to learn the program. It can expand to fill the available time, but it gets old fast. Many people come to the program, and get scared off because of the god word, or because it requires work, effort, study, concentration, mindfulness. It requires decisions, perseverance, discomfort, rigorous honesty. It requires following the "rules", giving up of personal freedom to follow the rules. It required change. Change is the only thing this program offers, and you need to do all the work.
We need to find a god concept that works for us. Many of us " ignosics" ( that is i not a, look it up) or non-thesis's need to define a real god or concept, "the sum of the forces", and/or reason, logic, or what ever works. It is not what is but what we think or beleive that drives us. We may need to spend a bit of time in the study our god, and his rules, or learn the rules of nature. We may need to spend a bit of time studying ethics, or traffic law so that we may live by rigorous honesty. But then what? We need something to replace that desired effect that we were getting from the food. Therein lies the successful people in OA. There life becomes full of healthy activities, at least not harmful activities.
We learn to avoid / deal with food pushers, perhaps, or we learn to say no repeatedly. We learn to live normal in an obeseogenic environment, an essentially unfriendly dangerous environment. The Stoic learned to live in ancient Rome, also a dangerous environment, but not as nasty as today's environment. We have much more rip-off people, gougers, fraud artists, grinders, cross culture dishonesty, lack of ethics, and the like to deal with.
But what do I know. Be happy, smile easily, eat real food, and enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish.
OA can provide a replacement for a period of time, as it does take time to learn the program. It can expand to fill the available time, but it gets old fast. Many people come to the program, and get scared off because of the god word, or because it requires work, effort, study, concentration, mindfulness. It requires decisions, perseverance, discomfort, rigorous honesty. It requires following the "rules", giving up of personal freedom to follow the rules. It required change. Change is the only thing this program offers, and you need to do all the work.
We need to find a god concept that works for us. Many of us " ignosics" ( that is i not a, look it up) or non-thesis's need to define a real god or concept, "the sum of the forces", and/or reason, logic, or what ever works. It is not what is but what we think or beleive that drives us. We may need to spend a bit of time in the study our god, and his rules, or learn the rules of nature. We may need to spend a bit of time studying ethics, or traffic law so that we may live by rigorous honesty. But then what? We need something to replace that desired effect that we were getting from the food. Therein lies the successful people in OA. There life becomes full of healthy activities, at least not harmful activities.
We learn to avoid / deal with food pushers, perhaps, or we learn to say no repeatedly. We learn to live normal in an obeseogenic environment, an essentially unfriendly dangerous environment. The Stoic learned to live in ancient Rome, also a dangerous environment, but not as nasty as today's environment. We have much more rip-off people, gougers, fraud artists, grinders, cross culture dishonesty, lack of ethics, and the like to deal with.
But what do I know. Be happy, smile easily, eat real food, and enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish.
Monday, January 13, 2014
OA Cult
OA is a cult, but it is a benign cult. The word "cult" has the same root as culture. Any culture is a cult, any culture that we wish do look down on is termed a cult. When we enter a program, we are entering an new culture.
A bit of gratitude like: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2egMSliB8DE may take us out of this thinking.
The purpose of OA is to change us to not wanting to eat or to provide us something else to focus on, to obsess about; a treatment process, a coping process, or a personality change. We deal with change in our thinking about food, eating and the world around us. We also need to change our behaviour and our eating. We need to make a decision, (1) do we want a form of recovery or (2) do we want to continue as before or (3) try something else. What other choice do we have? Death - That choice is not good either; it will come soon enough.
Try something. Get rid of the temptations and convent foods. Eat only "real" foods, stuff that would have been eaten a few hundred years ago, a few thousand ago. Stop the "forth" meal or cut meal size. Stop eating between meals. Stop eating sugar and/or grains and/or seed oils and/or fats (but we need some). Keep a food diary. Do something. OA is about fixing the reasons we eat, so that unconsciously, physically, emotionally, socially, philosophically, we will not be pushed to eat. We need to change, in ways we have never before considered. Or get active, build muscle, burn energy, burn fat, do some for others.
I eat to much some days, I eat to be sedated. Insulin is a sedative. I do not want to feel, for then I would need to act, and I do not want to act, for those required actions are going to upset routine, and require effort and motivation. There is the problem, I am lazy now, not driven to physical action. That is lack of dopamine, lack of energy. Retirement has a down side, time to fill with other activities.
Be happy. Eat real food. Enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish.
A bit of gratitude like: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2egMSliB8DE may take us out of this thinking.
The purpose of OA is to change us to not wanting to eat or to provide us something else to focus on, to obsess about; a treatment process, a coping process, or a personality change. We deal with change in our thinking about food, eating and the world around us. We also need to change our behaviour and our eating. We need to make a decision, (1) do we want a form of recovery or (2) do we want to continue as before or (3) try something else. What other choice do we have? Death - That choice is not good either; it will come soon enough.
Try something. Get rid of the temptations and convent foods. Eat only "real" foods, stuff that would have been eaten a few hundred years ago, a few thousand ago. Stop the "forth" meal or cut meal size. Stop eating between meals. Stop eating sugar and/or grains and/or seed oils and/or fats (but we need some). Keep a food diary. Do something. OA is about fixing the reasons we eat, so that unconsciously, physically, emotionally, socially, philosophically, we will not be pushed to eat. We need to change, in ways we have never before considered. Or get active, build muscle, burn energy, burn fat, do some for others.
I eat to much some days, I eat to be sedated. Insulin is a sedative. I do not want to feel, for then I would need to act, and I do not want to act, for those required actions are going to upset routine, and require effort and motivation. There is the problem, I am lazy now, not driven to physical action. That is lack of dopamine, lack of energy. Retirement has a down side, time to fill with other activities.
Be happy. Eat real food. Enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish.
Saturday, January 11, 2014
Where does one start?
Where does one start in the program? Where you are.
Big book, pg 569 The purpose of the program is to foster a change in thinking sufficient to bring about a end to the overeating problem. This can be said and done in many ways, program, education, training, spiritual awaking, personality change, food study, philosophy ... pick one or more... which is sufficient to bring about change to ordered eating from disordered eating.
Or sufficient change in thinking, feelings, behaviours, (Physical, Emotional, {Mental or Spiritual or Philosophical}) to leave specific food out of our eating plan: sugars, wheat, grains, acellular carbohydrates, omega 6 oils, endorphins, endcanopioids, hormones, etc. I consider sugar, grains and O6 oils to be sweet tasting poison.
Or if you have a simple volume issue, three moderate meals each day, each and ever day. Some people fing weighting and measuring an alternate obsession, but it also works for some.
My life was unmanageable a that is what trained me to eat. Insulin, generated in response to carbohydrate intake, is a sedative. I liked to be sedated in unmanageable situations. I became conditioned to eat in response to anxiety, trauma, insecurity, harassment, bulling, etc. I survived, grew up and left that environment, but it took years to get out of from behind that early conditioning and it would be easy to slip back into it. When I venture back into that environment, those same conditioning remains in that obeseogenic environment, so I do not spend any time there, no more than necessary, and have eliminated all those obeseogenic custom in my own home, as much as I am able.
The first 164 pages of the big book, and OA stories are a good place to start. Food knowledge is required; however, that will take time to learn and sort real from fictional diets. Development of rigorous honesty, and a solid understanding of a real god concept was required for me. After that, my knowledge gathering took me into addiction recovery methods, psychology and philosophy. I followed the next obvious problem need to be solved. Perseverance, diligence, and study has led me around to many useful things.
I, personally found that to deal with the known hyperinsulinema, - insulin resistance, I needed a low carbohydrate, high fat diet, aka HFLC, Paleo, Primal, type diet, and a full life between meals.
I am happy to answer any questions. Be happy, eat real food that you would have found in the 19 century, except acellular carbohydrates. Enjoy what life has to offer. (Daoish close)
Fredt.
Big book, pg 569 The purpose of the program is to foster a change in thinking sufficient to bring about a end to the overeating problem. This can be said and done in many ways, program, education, training, spiritual awaking, personality change, food study, philosophy ... pick one or more... which is sufficient to bring about change to ordered eating from disordered eating.
Or sufficient change in thinking, feelings, behaviours, (Physical, Emotional, {Mental or Spiritual or Philosophical}) to leave specific food out of our eating plan: sugars, wheat, grains, acellular carbohydrates, omega 6 oils, endorphins, endcanopioids, hormones, etc. I consider sugar, grains and O6 oils to be sweet tasting poison.
Or if you have a simple volume issue, three moderate meals each day, each and ever day. Some people fing weighting and measuring an alternate obsession, but it also works for some.
My life was unmanageable a that is what trained me to eat. Insulin, generated in response to carbohydrate intake, is a sedative. I liked to be sedated in unmanageable situations. I became conditioned to eat in response to anxiety, trauma, insecurity, harassment, bulling, etc. I survived, grew up and left that environment, but it took years to get out of from behind that early conditioning and it would be easy to slip back into it. When I venture back into that environment, those same conditioning remains in that obeseogenic environment, so I do not spend any time there, no more than necessary, and have eliminated all those obeseogenic custom in my own home, as much as I am able.
The first 164 pages of the big book, and OA stories are a good place to start. Food knowledge is required; however, that will take time to learn and sort real from fictional diets. Development of rigorous honesty, and a solid understanding of a real god concept was required for me. After that, my knowledge gathering took me into addiction recovery methods, psychology and philosophy. I followed the next obvious problem need to be solved. Perseverance, diligence, and study has led me around to many useful things.
I, personally found that to deal with the known hyperinsulinema, - insulin resistance, I needed a low carbohydrate, high fat diet, aka HFLC, Paleo, Primal, type diet, and a full life between meals.
I am happy to answer any questions. Be happy, eat real food that you would have found in the 19 century, except acellular carbohydrates. Enjoy what life has to offer. (Daoish close)
Fredt.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Children at meetings
Our sunday meeting has a new mother who would like to bring her child to the meeting to eliminate the need for child care. My opinion on this follows, and applies only to pre-toddler children.
A pre-toddler child at the meeting is not going to effect the recovery I obtain at a meeting. My rate of change at meetings is very low.
A pre-toddler is not going to effect me caring the message to others in a significant way. If it does not effect my ability, it is not likely to impact others much either.
Banning pre-toddler will remove the possibility of caring the message to the mother. This is a for sure situation.
I would be very reluctant to say many things if a toddler or more was in the room. It is unclear when defining moments start to occur.
So I will be voting to allow pre-toddlers to attend as long as they are relatively quiet.
A pre-toddler child at the meeting is not going to effect the recovery I obtain at a meeting. My rate of change at meetings is very low.
A pre-toddler is not going to effect me caring the message to others in a significant way. If it does not effect my ability, it is not likely to impact others much either.
Banning pre-toddler will remove the possibility of caring the message to the mother. This is a for sure situation.
I would be very reluctant to say many things if a toddler or more was in the room. It is unclear when defining moments start to occur.
So I will be voting to allow pre-toddlers to attend as long as they are relatively quiet.
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
Food addiction / Overeating
http://blog.smartrecovery.org/2014/01/07/get-your-loved-one-sober-alternatives-to-nagging-pleading-and-threatening/ shows how different alcohol addiction is compared to the food addiction that I have.
My food addiction has a root in childhood. It is (was) frequently a coping mechanism for some situation that I found caused us stress, or there was no solution for. Overeating was a survival tool, learned in childhood. It is as pervasive as any life skill, as is my low social need, also learned in childhood. Poor close humiliation, poverty or frugality/ uncaring parents, unreachable expectation of parents, continual comparison with cousins, continual criticism, abusive parents, cold house (I damn near froze in the winters), work overload, no guidance, what ever the situation, I (we) ate.
Overeating became an mental escape for a few minutes, a coping method. Nagging, bitching, threatening drove me further into the disorder. Once the situation was removed (I was able to leave), overeating was a coping method I turned to as the first method of delaying, a "flight fight freeze" type of response. Overeating was conditioned in as our first response, it became part of my personality. Now as soon as I am exposed to stress, my first reaction is to want to eat. Add continual stress... and we find obesity. This is beyond and addition to the food addiction issues that come as a result of the overeating.
When we stop overeating, we need another methods of coping with the stresses... some of us find them, some do not. In order to recover from overeating as a coping skill, we need some type of release. Exercise is one possible, but only if we "enjoy". It is finding a enjoyable coping skill that is crucial to lasting recovery. Work was a "solution" when I was in a period of "enjoyment" at work, but with retirement....
Overeating and low social need are part of my personality. It is essentially a personality change that is required to overcome these issues. As you all may know personality change is not easy. It is equal to a gay becoming straight, or straight becoming gay. Most people do not even try to change personality's, but that is what is necessary for some of us to overcome overeating.
The overeating I speak of, from childhood, is not the same of later developing overeating, as David Kessler speaks of, although both may exist in the same person. Treatment of overeating must consider the cause of that specific individual, and where overeating is a coping skill, that skill must be replaced as well. A true cost benefit analysis, done thoroughly honest, will show up the difference, however, it take considerable recovery to reach that level of self honesty.
But what do I know? Be well, eat real food, breath deeply, smile easily, and enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish.
My food addiction has a root in childhood. It is (was) frequently a coping mechanism for some situation that I found caused us stress, or there was no solution for. Overeating was a survival tool, learned in childhood. It is as pervasive as any life skill, as is my low social need, also learned in childhood. Poor close humiliation, poverty or frugality/ uncaring parents, unreachable expectation of parents, continual comparison with cousins, continual criticism, abusive parents, cold house (I damn near froze in the winters), work overload, no guidance, what ever the situation, I (we) ate.
Overeating became an mental escape for a few minutes, a coping method. Nagging, bitching, threatening drove me further into the disorder. Once the situation was removed (I was able to leave), overeating was a coping method I turned to as the first method of delaying, a "flight fight freeze" type of response. Overeating was conditioned in as our first response, it became part of my personality. Now as soon as I am exposed to stress, my first reaction is to want to eat. Add continual stress... and we find obesity. This is beyond and addition to the food addiction issues that come as a result of the overeating.
When we stop overeating, we need another methods of coping with the stresses... some of us find them, some do not. In order to recover from overeating as a coping skill, we need some type of release. Exercise is one possible, but only if we "enjoy". It is finding a enjoyable coping skill that is crucial to lasting recovery. Work was a "solution" when I was in a period of "enjoyment" at work, but with retirement....
Overeating and low social need are part of my personality. It is essentially a personality change that is required to overcome these issues. As you all may know personality change is not easy. It is equal to a gay becoming straight, or straight becoming gay. Most people do not even try to change personality's, but that is what is necessary for some of us to overcome overeating.
The overeating I speak of, from childhood, is not the same of later developing overeating, as David Kessler speaks of, although both may exist in the same person. Treatment of overeating must consider the cause of that specific individual, and where overeating is a coping skill, that skill must be replaced as well. A true cost benefit analysis, done thoroughly honest, will show up the difference, however, it take considerable recovery to reach that level of self honesty.
But what do I know? Be well, eat real food, breath deeply, smile easily, and enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish.
Sunday, January 5, 2014
Thursday, January 2, 2014
Broken People Get Recycled 1
Recovery Process
Through rigorous honesty, I recognised that the first step is backwards, a life that we cannot handle is the cause of addiction, just pick the substance. It is that unmanageable life, our thinking primarily, but also our behaviours and emotional management that we need to relearn, but correctly this time, to recover.
The program is intended to pick up individuals from the human scrap pile, dust them off, and perhaps pound our a few of the major dints, straighten us out a bit, give us a few tools and set us lose. Is that enough? Perhaps some of us need to be rebuilt from the ground up. A off frame restoration. A total overhaul. We are the badly damaged ones. Internal, spiritual, physical, emotional, and spiritual. Yes, I said spiritual twice, it is that important. In fact, spiritual, philosophical, and knowledge are interconnected, and may be different parts of the same thing. We also need to look at our attitudes, behaviours, feelings, actions, beliefs, and all those other soft learned items. Neuroplasticity is real, and we can clean out our brains, relearn basic things and start building from there.
The program attempt to foster a spiritual awaking, a new way of thinking, a philosophical change, sufficient to bring about a end to the problem. It is this change in beliefs that has the trickle down effect to change our behaviours. Before I make the decision to make this changes, it would be nice to know what was going to change, but since that is in the future, I cannot know. We must go through life without fear or too much hope for the future, and without regret for the past. It is not wise to build expectations of the future. I also recognise that others live for the hope, rather than for the now.
So in the morning (when wake up alive) I ask "what created all this?" I can say "the sum of all natural forces of the past and present", which I know will continue just the same into the future. It is the forces, unseen, but feel-able, that I rationalize as god. His will, natures will, the sum of the skills and abilities, that must be followed. So forward we must go into time, without knowing what will happen. We can avoid some of the traps that we already know about, but not those we find along the way. The difficulty is the pushing of others, when we know it is just wrong. We may need to make those tough decisions, and step back from the known, and choose the unknown. Do what is more right, rather than the more convenient.
Be well, eat real food, breath deeply, smile easily, and enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish
Through rigorous honesty, I recognised that the first step is backwards, a life that we cannot handle is the cause of addiction, just pick the substance. It is that unmanageable life, our thinking primarily, but also our behaviours and emotional management that we need to relearn, but correctly this time, to recover.
The program is intended to pick up individuals from the human scrap pile, dust them off, and perhaps pound our a few of the major dints, straighten us out a bit, give us a few tools and set us lose. Is that enough? Perhaps some of us need to be rebuilt from the ground up. A off frame restoration. A total overhaul. We are the badly damaged ones. Internal, spiritual, physical, emotional, and spiritual. Yes, I said spiritual twice, it is that important. In fact, spiritual, philosophical, and knowledge are interconnected, and may be different parts of the same thing. We also need to look at our attitudes, behaviours, feelings, actions, beliefs, and all those other soft learned items. Neuroplasticity is real, and we can clean out our brains, relearn basic things and start building from there.
The program attempt to foster a spiritual awaking, a new way of thinking, a philosophical change, sufficient to bring about a end to the problem. It is this change in beliefs that has the trickle down effect to change our behaviours. Before I make the decision to make this changes, it would be nice to know what was going to change, but since that is in the future, I cannot know. We must go through life without fear or too much hope for the future, and without regret for the past. It is not wise to build expectations of the future. I also recognise that others live for the hope, rather than for the now.
So in the morning (when wake up alive) I ask "what created all this?" I can say "the sum of all natural forces of the past and present", which I know will continue just the same into the future. It is the forces, unseen, but feel-able, that I rationalize as god. His will, natures will, the sum of the skills and abilities, that must be followed. So forward we must go into time, without knowing what will happen. We can avoid some of the traps that we already know about, but not those we find along the way. The difficulty is the pushing of others, when we know it is just wrong. We may need to make those tough decisions, and step back from the known, and choose the unknown. Do what is more right, rather than the more convenient.
Be well, eat real food, breath deeply, smile easily, and enjoy what life has to offer. Daoish
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