Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Defining Recovery

What does 'recovery' look like?   How would I know, I have lived in and with this 'disease', issue, condition, problem, behavior, what ever you call it, all of my life that I remember?

I would not think, obsess about the next meal, but instead would eat small uniform meals at a set schedule, go to bed on schedule, get up on schedule. But I want to watch late night TV, when the blood and gut and gore shows are on. No. But that is not likely to happen yet.

When I get up, come home, and wander around the house, turning off the lights that were left on, closing the windows that are open and the furnace on, I will not be bothered by how careless the wife is now. It will not bother me that she will not do anything on here own volition any more. Nothing around here at least. But why should I care? She does not care.  

Well it would include enthusiasm for life, a few passions that would drive me, none that would drive me to the food. It would not include the need to tell people when they are wrong. That critical element, that my father had, and I inherited, has a bad effect on everyone. It served well during my time in QC positions, and in the engineering forensic and insurance work, but it must go in my personal life. Somethings are up to me and some are not. Keeping my mouth shut must be part of my new recovery personality, about those things that are not up to me. But what about my archery coaching? Here is something you might change for improvement. Try not dropping your bow hand until the arrow hits the target. Tighten back and follow through.

Passion for life and what life has to offer is required. 

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