One of the frustrating things I see in program, after hanging around 20 some years, through thick, thin, thick, thin, erratic, half sane, and stoic, is seeing the mistakes that I made being repeated by others.
One common mistake is making big changes fast without failsafe system in place, and expecting not to fail. What does this mean? When we are in the process of changing a habit, addiction, or negative behavior by adopting a new philosophy of life, errors are likely. It is our first time. We need to expect that for a time, several months, and likely for years, we may almost unthinkingly slip back to our subconscious way of reacting to some stimulus. We need to consciously entrench into our subconscious the "new behavior." When we suddenly change a bunch of things, we are going to slip, sooner or later, and when we do, we must immediately stop, get up, dust ourselves off, and get back onto our new program. We may need to add more to our philosophy, or do more subconscious reprogramming, to cover new situations. We may need to adjust our environment. We may need a bigger hammer. Whatever.
We need to know that we are the most important person to ourselves, and we must do what we must do for survival. No ands, if, or buts. The bottom line. Survival is necessary for anything to matter. Other around us may not recognise nor accept the seriousness of the situation. If we want recovery, we must do what is necessary.
If we pray for potatoes, we must be willing to pick up the hoe. We also must plant them, water them, and not allow others to plant weeds in them nor pull them out.
To me the program is just a guide. Some of the steps or the words of the step are dull pointers to the underlying necessary concept. They show one way, but miss the necessary concept underneath, which is essential.
We also must recognise that there will be times when we have no support, and are "fighting a strong current". It may be best to make way to shore and walk away.