http://innerpilgrimage.wordpress.com/2012/09/06/a-gentler-path/ got me thinking about stating in this blog what I really believe and feel.
In my case, I do not care what others believe; they can believe what ever crap they want. I do resent the time I wasted trying to understand their irrational beliefs and well as irrational english grammar. I resent being lead astray by organised religion, the do as I say, not do as I do, and by the media with there overstatements, and sensationalizing. Their credibility is zero now, in my mind. I resent the media and the advertising, especially food advertising.
The world is a power outside of me that will mow me down, and kill me off. Reality, fact, evolution of concepts, and the persistence of natural urges, I do believe. I have a natural compulsive urge to eat. I did not ask for it, I do not want it, but I have it. Now I have to learn to live with it. The choice is to eat and die of obesity, as I have seen many die, or to follow a program of food restriction. Those are the choices. A LCHF diet helps, but the urge to eat is still there. There is no escape that I have yet found.
Powerlessness is evident, faith in the schwartz and OA; Accepting reality, life contains sufferering, and that the suffering is caused by my desire to be free of the compulsive urge to eat, desire, delusion that I should be free of the urge, and aversion to the compulsive urge. There is much to distract (refocus) if I look at self improvement imposed through the OA steps or Buddha,s eight. But the compulsion remains.
The only relief comes through redirection of the compulsive urge to something less damaging, that I also enjoy.
I find it annoying that western society in general and western medicine denies the existence of compulsive urges to eat. And yet there it is.
3 comments:
I agree with you. LCHF made a huge difference for me to control the cravings. The only way I manage to keep from regaining is to have divorced myself from eating ANY higher-carb foods. I'm the food Nazi in my family and everyone hates me for it, but to have it around means to eat it at some craving moment. However, after being true to my lifestyle for a couple years, I lost the cravings for the carbage. Experience tells me if I start eating any of it though , they would return in short order , so I just do not take any chances. There are even days when I just want to eat too much of the stuff I eat regularly. Weight control is a struggle every day. Overweight people do need will-power not to cave. It depends on what they are eating as to how much it takes.
Yes, the cravings reduce but not the compulsion, at least in my case. I talk about this further in my other blog, http://philosophyofweightmanagement.blogspot.ca/ .
I did try to keep the physical food issues separate the psychological issues but that is not easy to do.
I am also rigid in what I eat, and make my feelings known. Not a popular thing to do for sure. "But it messes up my blood sugar" and they stop to some extent.
Hey Fred. It's Jess (innerpilgrimage).
Thank you so much for being so supportive. I feel guilty if I dare say, "I don't care." I feel I am a bad person (okay, a sinner--still have the remnants of the martyr-good, self-caring-person-bad damage) for not being a doormat to others' opinions, advice, and concerns. I do care--just like I see you do when people keep honest, open, and willing to exchange ideas and think. I empathize about having resentments I don't want over the sales schpiel of, well, everything that isn't nailed down.
Though I don't know much about LCHF, I know people on the No-White-Foods plan who say they have never felt better. I know I have trouble when I overdo the sugar. Definitely putting pecan pie back on the trigger list, not because I'll binge a pie or two any more, but because I have an adverse reaction to the sugar in even one serving.
I read some of the sister-blog to this, Philosophy of Weight Management, especially on the LCFH principles. Having seen many types of food intolerances, I am not surprised at this one--White Foods sensitivity a lot of OAers have leads me to believe this is viable.
For now, I'm holding onto my USDA plan. I think I will be mindful of having very high-fiber whole grains play a larger part and consider lower fructose fresh fruit (the ones considered more diabetic-friendly). The fat? Well, I confess I used to drink melted butter as a trigger food (go crazy addict behavior), if I wasn't dipping anything I could find in it. So the HF would probably be high-fiber, with more walnuts and soybeans--because those fats are considered good for one's health.
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